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cross-reading of Warren** Bl bStjfal iraAf^' -eludes the mjfer Club.—Loni^;
itagé and4
conduct forgotten1 gain—
St. Bride, Fleet-¿ married to SaraB youth behaved with the greatest ñnníess during the awful ceremony, and received thy consolation» of religion with resignation*— Hkjva'i te'fine young
iog-aiick, and a portable tire range. “ Hol-oo$ Doctor, what in the name of goodness have you got on an oil-s^in gown for Pt “Th© best thing in the world, 1 al waya sleep in them travelling. Never sleep ia fine sheets»
Mathews bftifMflLiW/iitii teijkifif’ wfetg eatables.
of the London teMilroitiK* afeaaberlefos.* well Mr
Mathews—“ Theie’s
the House, and the paperevHIl be latesfos night;”; Bob—“ Then thettrll be a sharp de» bate in my house to-night.” Mr Mathews— “ Newspapers, Bob,are pabulum of life—they contain every thing: Marriages for maids, christenings for married ladies, deaths for undertakers, accidents for doctors, trial» for lawyers, cutting-up for butchers, and aflíuwe-mer.ts for every body?5 We have now a
“ ‘ rs, and After-)lub, invihich
“The Sim is. TheJtforittng getthat in the even-
“ Who’s got the Star.”1—Never Waiter, givejne
-u Mr Snowkes has set fire to the When that jtVsreZZer has run
re- always grateful ¡lowing is from the
nbliésofthe United t-fw, dinner at five o’clock; toever may be speaking, are to a moment. The scene .. .	, febles that in one of Foote’s
ghj® where itis announced to a host of starv-wHfebors that ‘the milk porridge is ready? ” beg leave to inform the Globe, that the system has been entirely chanced since it was made acquainted with the above fact. At present, when the hour of five arrives, the ser-jeant-at-armsenters the House on horseback, and blows Yankee Doodle thro’ a tin horn, a gag is immediately fastened on the mouth of him who occupies the floor, by the criér of Congress. The Speaker serves a mint jidap all round, fend the members are ssachcd out in regular order, to the tune of “O’Rourke’s noble fare will be never, forgot, By those who were there, and those who were not.”
“ Shepherd,” said a sentimental young lady, (who fancied herself a heroine in the golden groves of Arcadia,) “shepherd,” said she, to a rustic who was tending sheep, “why have you not got your pipe with you?” Bekase, ma’am, I ha’nt gotten no baccky??
Fossil Bones.—One of the largest stories we have seen is the following, respecting the skeleton of an animal ‘discoveredaboutfot» weeks since at the Big-Bone Lick, Kjfetucky ? Let those who can, give it credit.
‘There are ten or twelve sets of tofes, from4 to 12. feet long; the daws orolSfc
cheeks. Hecommencete every speech by “ 1* ti'ing, and 1 don’t uiean Mother, ba I ha. ba!” Here then is a purly for^a rubber, or to rub on a journey. They proceed to* Newmarket. Dr. C« provides his twb hundred tmvdiing indisiiemtbles. A senes of saucepans and a serte» of carMers, cases, cruet», pill-boxes, medicine cases, telescopes, apparatus, phosphorus -boxee, his. tiemay in. a^ bottle-jack, a blundtfefea.emm-met. Wit* all things; and lastly. ?q dreed ói byurophobia, two bludgeons with fekes at
ExtraordMiy speed of a Steam Carriage. — i n tiie London Globe and trinelter of the. 14th of Oct. i$ fee . íbllowing article takes' from the Taunton Courier.
taparro/Ze^rd Steam Engine
Stephensen, the proprietor of the lla^¿3 Engibe, on the run richest er and 14vfepi{¡j Rhii way, had this week decided in hi* la-vor a wager otoñe thoxisand gwtó upon-the speed of his Engine bj travesn&r $|ie two towns (tAirfy-/»#<? «dies') iny-MIfetY* THHEK MINUTE,»—) or ill Other WCtd*. at more than Jijty-ag/./ nales per hour.] " *
A Boston editor, speaking of ti’fecw paper, of unreasonably and inconvenifhUy large dimensions, says—“It is well cnkulatcd for boarding h on ns and hirge families, asa dozen persons may read it without incommoding each other.
moon for your warming pan.” The party now process to Tottenrsam-court-ro*d (au odd way, by the by, to Newmarket), and the Doctor lamente that Mr MacAdam^ stoney-hearted ilinte are not converted te' Stouey-l	could be more ludicrous
than Mr Mathews’ description of the four, conversing amidst the excessive jolting of the coach. . At the end of the road, Stubb^whose pe6rt is like a Cheshire meadow overflowed stop, I must« occasion i», S bullock aboui address the the cries o|;¿i
intemipt the dlBoiP 3	t'and conptSkfl Ifo
baran^wW^lWitt.Iey one thing¿ttuiil1 don't	frwaemoifcn&iuhu
rnacr, brtriwjbdtirtfyjand úuA^Slfr an animat over thé horns—Ladtfa-tiemen* how you like it yom, The bull, howqVer, nearly tosses the-toreto*^ and, when tafoto the coach, Rattle, duuteiog him, aeks whether the animal had more spite or gratitude towards his benefactor. Stubb» “ 1 muit say one thing, and I don’t untan another, it was nearly a	between^u»?’—
Dr. C. goes to sleep like a pelican, wito fate beak upon his bosom; when he finds aHittie terrier in the coach, he seize» bludgeon No. 2, and strives to strike, the animat Stutii interferes, aqd a ludicrous contest takes*'p]acc between them, and Stubbs says, “Doctor, Doctor, I’m astonished, recollect wbat pur immortal bard sajs, ‘That a parish beiítile feels as much as the giant Gog or Ms<pg? ”
herd;'T:-’wOTploufJ’"^The Doctor gets out backwards, pointing his .bludgeon No. 2, at the terrier in. Stubb’s arms. Just as he fiuts foot to the ground, a whole pack of fox-founds are^passiiig at full cry,—“ I will-, get io; for God’s sake let me in! I’ll not die in this manner; hydrophobia is ¿terribledeath? up- •*» •	-• ■	—	--	-
have my peristaltic persuaders
“ They are only fox-hounds.” y*** Wotee still
pocket?’ T Áor’e savour^ brought into White yeart actor of teste, Childt'atM the first M’SÜrI phi k .JI
• MR MATHEWS’S «NT«RTAJWíM®eT ■	araiir« mkktxng.” ” /
\	obrnmenc^bytoSlforus tfant
he Resalí ” aboard for an At Home?’ Hi* object was te find a «abject to wfafoh nobody «Mid object. But this waino easy matter for a tenth “ At Home;” ho h»¿ os¿ rawtóm* ¿tay#-had taken French leave of Me FVeneh, ti^Maintaoue»; fate rlV¿» to Pam had been fairly tripped up-he had thrown away hi» MemoraMtim. Book—he cou Id no longer remember bis ficmíni^ncca— hn had Vrtit his Cottntry Cotuiiu^ and got rid of Wlnvitolion*. Mr Mathews now, with inimitable, drollery, imifates the voice, the face and muuueto of various persons who are prone to advice. What Shmd:m call* “d—d good natured friend»,” or as Lloyd says— <• When foes insultar pitying friendsdispense In counsels strains the worst of insolence.” In short, Mr Mathews is *o pestered with advice, that be exclaims, “Talk not Io me of the Society for the Suppression of Fice.— Would there were a Society for the Suppres-Bion of ad-vice.” One friend takes him by the button, and says, “ My good fellow, I atu sure you have too much good sense to bean- hv the Metro noyedat what I am going tosay$” and then 1 * e '	- 1
says something so annoy mg that neither good ■ nor bad sense can stand it. Another frienu = gets him in the coiner, and says with a most ludicrous gravity, “My dear friend, Mr Mathews, what I am going to say may be ofleo-xive to you, .but I assure you, it arises solely frommy having your interest so much at heart.” A third begins, “I are-mre, Sir, what lam going to say, though it may be disagreeable to you,is meant in ihmbastofToel* iog.” Mr xMathews mo*t siguificSstly*«iííke at the audience, and rays, “ Weil, cb&, 1 see you all upderotand what I mean’V laegh-ter is irresistible. One of these good natured friend* gave bim a hint, and upon thte bint bespoke.' Thejriond teys, “ Now my .good fellow, you oaji teka a hint You must know you are not quite so active as you used to be;
tn short, you are not the person you were.— Last year at Dury-lane you were but a tome actor.” [Mr Matnews it is well known is lame.] “ Why, zounds, you wtirb the very person th at ad vised me to quit the legitimate drama, and be “ At Home.” Mr Mathews now sings a very humorous song, in which he brings in an imitation of all the characters in ; hi» proceeding “At Homes.” The effect is iri
I was interrupted by a soft rat-tat at the door—what publicans would calla mild tap —it was from Dr. Cullender, famous for bis attention to Hons’ heads and to the beads of knockers—one of the faculty who recommends composure aud rejmse, and rap , their iuetructions on the stref door by way of ratification. These doctors don’t like knocks on their own doors, at least if they are nocturnal. Dr. CuUételer has a thousand con-; tri vanees, a thoteWSi^xl^avrtgancie»—he is a ' /medical Du Crow1,riding five orrix' horsey, at once—he was: physician, mus^ciaiii 0P$<* cian, matbeiiiaticjart, - chymist, machimit, cook, traveller, and a score of other thing» This amiable, clever,>nd eccentric pr. jjlíífc; lender (alias Dr. Kitchenerenters with ¿i» right leg foremost, with an air of timidity,, fais arms hanging loosely, and his head rolling about like an independant member—“ Ayé, how are you—how are you—very yellow-curry in your face—quite yellow—bill -wrong «-if you wish to be a long liver you must take some of my peristaltic persuaderB^some of my peptic pill». Do you eat Well ?” “ Yes.” “ Sleep well ?” ’ “ Yes ” “ Eh! I’ll do away with all that for you—recommend a jaunt-do you good—improve your optics—and your peptics—and raise your vocal faculties—must move—health is not local like Epping sausages.' At this moment a knock is heard at the door, loud as the great gun of Killarney,with its parent import and little echoes Dr. Culleh-‘ der: “What vim call that—making a call?
1 call it making vinegar. Such thund< rill turn all your smallheer—it jsflames me to be roused out of a reverie hy a rapperee—but when should a man be hot, but when he’s wrapt up.”
Enter Rattle, añ autobiographer—a rcool-¿ lector of whut will be always sowing seeds for Tv"ir^»iiitecene6e6—-writing his life,, not that he 4' might lite; but living that he might write» .Rattle is desperate for a few anecdqtei— fh I’ve lived thirty y^firo---not aline for my book?’ These xeti(lejtnen are jollied by Mr Humi)uity§|pbte<. fifoknamed Cruelty Stubbs from hte eiflesmM sympathy for au living thiewiL The fat Mr Humanity Stubb* new laiigh8,be qnly lanoite be laugh» when ne thnee utfleÁ. Ha! ha! haThe first from bis throat* the Second from the pit of hi* Mo-raack,	from his whole body
^Jj^RlNTI.K^<aevery description executed yr with accuracy, and despatch
.ewe,feet broad; IM writs ¿ire M»nge<-toa-.étecular order, as it by the Wet*»; witfam the efrde the-bout» are.ifejpOMted, which when placeti together, emimnl to have been at least feet factoid 60 feet long. The bkuil terne atom.» wrighwdy 400 pounds. 7hey were fodnd about Mfret below the surface <u the earth. Thu aAfou te reíd to be «a vs ng. o» ty cw	rite,?
“ PshaWj Doctor, they won’t eat you.”—“ I ‘ »in.my pdeket; persuade thefo to,eat any thing?’—
—Jet me in, I have some, cold goose in my » .. mfee jOgg £0 faU foul of the Doc* ^rocket, bill 'he te rescued and WfiLstage. At Hackeim, the te SS^t try Bob Merringt i, an , wtfoM&ed io act qr U)efipoiled íííoíg^g no topped,wysc, in Mhiofaii^AABn ti¿p
good song respecting newsi wards a debate in the Rea?. Mr Mathews’s versatility is truly excéllent-“ Waiter, where’s the Sun?” -	~ •
never out, Sir, until Journal, then?’—“ ing, Sir.” comes here till noon the Globe. Globe” round the room, I’ll thank you for it,”—
Waiter* te there such a paper now aa the “ That gcnOeman
- ---	- «Give.
¡kííiKm?’—“The Statesman telrot, Go, then, and buy -another.; títere are. pltiity to be bought.” “ W aiter, then# te a Dl&teke is ¿y bilL” <l Waiter, we want
an Examiner.” “ What a 'greasy'	Simg’kM
man thte is!” “ When Mr Snip, the toiloift' y~‘" will set the British ..Pre«i aCliberty, I’ll th&ek him for it.” Snip—“I was only totekiw *1 the Government were going to takis,^^ measures.” “ Mt Ilotikina your <Nfetb‘<»» in the naper the other day ?’	“Pa
very ^lad to hear .it?’ “ Poor Thteikina iaf ihe Gazette?’ “ I’m now to the end of the ' Gazette, and ! dorri toe bis name?* “ Thai’» the Literary Gazette; you’ll never «ce his name there?’ A Doctor i« how to read the pa|>er pro bono publieo. “ I never read any thing but accidents and offences; one good accident-te worth twenty leading articles?’ “ Mr Boxall, the undertaker wxH read ” Don’t let him; he roads nothing but deaths?’—Mr Parchment (an Attorney ) —“Gentlemen, 1’11 read. 'Walkinsv. Wii-kins.—This was an action”—“Stop, stop, that’s professional again?’ At.Iasi the Doc* tor reads bis accidents. “ During the dreadful storm, last Thursday, a lamblighter, lighting one of the gas lamps on tiolborn-bill, was blown off hi» ladder, and carried to the amazing distance of Hatton-Gatoen. He fell at the door of No. 60, where Macassar Oil continues ro be. sold—Trowing the paper down in a passion.—“ Pshaw! A Pull— a vile puff—of all thiugs 1 hatea puff—1 was never taken in so before, and never, never, Portugal—Ah! this is
JV-p> A DVEKtlSEMEXTS fowuñk'd to the office of the “Mexican Citizen,” for publication murt he paid in advance, otherwise they will not be inserted.
Austin, April )4th, 1831.
/l^LOTHING.—Received per reh*r. Spica, 'Sr a large and extensive assortment of frock and dress coats, pantaloons, vests, etc. of superior quality and woikmanship, from the house or Burk ¿¿ Wateorq New-York— well worthy the a tention ofcash customet».
■_/ EDWARD ROBERTSON.
Brotorisu April 9, 1831.	9-3t
yithfl61Mild head has got it, Sir. cue á 3®¿etoKm?’—“ f~*
V^BOTICE.-í-My friends in Texas, will please when advising their correspondents to direct their letters to my care, to be.very particular in requesting them to pay the postage, as I will not receive them from the office unless the postage has been paid.
J. W. COLLINS.
New-Orleans, ^arch 27, 1831.	*9-6
H^O^EACKSS^H^Foi^S^r tt. the Shop and Tools,, together with a complete set of Gtcnsmilh's Toohs now occupied by Jabez Barney-—it is one of the bert situations for a smithery in the Colony,— For further particulars, enquire of
THOMAS DAVIS.
Villa Austin, April 14, 1831.	9-3
NlgbEING npder the necessity of going to iSfl^Nów^rJeans on business, 1 Lave ap-wWetigOrotber J. Scanlan, my agent duringz^lroienee, who is fully authorised, tb tramWbt business for and in my name.
MICHAEL SCANLAN.
P. S. For sale as above, an invaluable Specific for the Ague and Fever.
Villa de Austin, April 14,1831.	9-3
V»OTICE.—All persons indebted to me by note or account, are requested to make payment to Messrs Perry & Hunter, who are fully authorised to give receipts in. my name.
JOSHUA FLETCHER.
/ Villa de Austin, April 14,1831.	9-3t
Entertainment at Brazoria.—ti^ dKh subscriber has opened a boarding-house and pledges himself that his table and beds shall be as good as the country will afford. He is also making arrangements for receiving horses and supplying them with corn and provender.	WM, T. AUSTIN.
Brazoria; Feb. 25, ¡83L	4-6t
^g^ilEAP GOODS.—Superfine high'and W low crown Hate, coarse and
and Shoes, summer hud winter Cloatl>™¿8&-' sorted Dry Goods, Groeeries,Cut)ery,^Kcol Books,old R^clVhiskcy by the b^rreu, etc. for 6&le LOW FOR CASH ONLY* • , *
San Felipe, April 7. 8-4. M’QUEEKx;^
>R’S. PE EBLES fe MILLER baro >k received.» genero! fwortment of Freeh Medicines.	.
Villa de Aü8tiB,Marck 5L	7tf.
	----- ^OR SALÉ^	sitúa.
4$ ted on |he ’Esit.ide of the Brazos river, precisely at the bw^f tide. For terms an-PV to >WILUAM3ON.
Pshaw! A Puff vile puff—-of all things 1 batea puff—1
will be again.
toy thing interesting no doubt (reads).—We ¡■gredibly informed, that Don Miguel, ow-¡Hly the spirited interference of our Cabin-h*® ^0UMC^< und |>arti" cwWtitvfirtt# Queen Dowager has publicly ^toWfleMMctermiuation never to <i»e any WlM^ulto fiKPayand Martin’s real Junin Doctor, again Whii^illMttrod another word |tísMr Fowler, a dull píjarier sees any thing-to Ids bass voice beglin to roafi^HltoHeiftliiigs), “ During the dr«id|uljhuDto j^orm of Sunday night, the eiTOtei® fl^’ enfe^itbeemtepremtoes of Mr Wflkitt», at Reading, and did considerable Ramage—notwithst andinga large re ward,and tótánt pursuit being made,, we are sorry to the villain has escaped from apprel en-rion?* Mr Fowler: “ Surprising I” Itetads again—“On Tuesday, at Covent-garden, a young gentleman sustained the arduous character of Hamlet, fetd performed the taste in fifteen minutes with ease?» “1 don’t beEeVe; a word of it—impossible.” Reads again-7-: “Lost, on Wednesday, a beautiful mail French lap-dog, answering to the name of
retain roMeffwusolate. parents, he will be joyfully received, and his „	i”—“Shocking!” Read» a-
Yesierday at the Parish Church of *** eet, Thomas Morgan was Jenkins. The unhappy during the awful ceremony,‘and received the coMoIatioes of religion with resignation*— fine young man, aged twenty-five, ®^§^ceptii^this instance, had never been uct himself?’ This with a iiemg a ?tbe ar»» atid ét-ck, con-acene the Newspaper ■rei <4, * ■
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